The life of a chamelion

I know that I have changed; that I am different. However, it is hard to see that difference when I'm thrown back in a situation where I was before that change took place. All of a sudden, much to my chagrin, I find myself responding, acting, and functioning the same old way I always have. It makes me sad, and discouraged, and really frustrated because I know that this is no longer me!! I feel fairly helpless. Will this never end?

But I know that despite my frustration, God is working. He is teaching me to relax (goodness knows I need to learn!!) He is showing me old comfortable patterns and asking me to break them... even where it would bring disturbance. He is showing me my weaknesses; I pray the he gives me the strength to show my true colours. I don't want to live like a chamelion.

Integrity